The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicals
by SoulX2005
Summary: A new evil is in Hyrule, and Link has to find all nine of the ancient chronicals to defeat this new evil! (AN JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WOULDN'T COME BACK...!)
1. The Journey Home

The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicles  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Zelda because I suck!!!! Nintendo owns it!!!  
  
Chapter 1: The Journey Home  
  
"You shall die Ganon!!!" yelled a courageous hero clad in green.  
  
"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!" the huge monstrous beast bellowed into the sky, writhing in pain.  
  
"Now!!! Sages!!!!!! Ancient creators of Hyrule!!! Focus your energy to contain the beast!!!" An elegant princess yelled over the bellowing as a beam of light came off of her hands. "Link!! Use the sacred sword of evil's bane to finish him off!!!!"  
  
"Ok!!" The hero so-called Link said. "ARRRGGHHHHHH !!!!!!!" He yelled, thrusting his sword into the monstrosity.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" The creature screamed as the blade plunged into his skin. "ONCE I GET OUT OF HERE, I WILL WREAK HAVOC ON YOUR OFFSPRING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"CURSE YOU ZELDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CURSE YOU SAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CURSE YOU LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK!!!"  
  
Ganon was no more. Hyrule is at peace. Link can go home.  
  
Or so he thought...................  
  
As our hero walks back to Kokori Forest, now a boy, he is in the vast Hyrule Field. With its luscious green meadows and its tall pine trees, it was a peaceful place...in the day. But at night, it was a graveyard of vicious creatures that poke up from the ground, hoping to grab any unsuspecting victim that's unlucky enough to be wandering the field at night.  
  
"Maybe we should step on it, Navi." Link said to the curious light bulb floating about his head. "It's getting dark." "Maybe we...LINK LOOK OUT!!!" Suddenly a wave of dark energy hit them as Navi uttered these words! Link was blinded in the wave, not being able to make out the figure in the shadows.  
  
"MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Boomed the dark silhouette of a huge man.  
  
"Link, who is that!?" Navi cried.  
  
"I don't know!" Link said as he drew his sword. Suddenly a ball of energy flew towards him! "AHHHHHHHHH!!!" Link cried as he was hit with the flaming ball of dark plasma.  
  
"Uhhh......Huh?" Link stuttered as he looked around as the silhouette and the darkness disappeared. "What happened?"  
  
"You were attacked by...."  
  
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Who was the silhouetted figure? Why did it attack Link? Was it Kapeora Geabora????? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! NOT KAPEORA!! Find out who it was in the next episode of......The Lost Chronicles!!! 


	2. To Gerudo Valley!

The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicles  
  
Disclaimer: Read last chapter...  
  
(A/N: Thank you Mediciner for reviewing! It makes me feel so good that I think I shall go smite Bob!!! Bob: OO)  
  
Chapter 2: The Mysterious Ruins  
  
When we last left our hero, he had just been defeated by the gloomy shadow of....um...shadow. ;; We return as Navi is about to reveal to him the name of this nemesis...... (Another A/N: I changed the format!!!!! I AM ULTRON!!![whom I don't own] Bob: O......................K....................... OO) Navi: The King of Evil, Ganondorf! Or so I think...  
  
Link: NAVI!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW!!!!  
  
Navi: SHUT UP!!! I WAS BLINDED TOO!!!!!  
  
Link: Ok, fine! But what do we do now? How do we defeat him again??  
  
At this point of his travels, link was exhausted from his travels and adventures throughout Hyrule. He just wanted to go home to his comfortable bed and sleep for...... 5 or so days. ;; Just then, Rauru suddenly appeared in front of his eyes!!!(Well, technically, behind his back...)  
  
Rauru: Hello, Link.  
  
Link: AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! XX  
  
Rauru: LINK!!!!!! WAKE UP!!!!!!!!  
  
Link: (Wakes up from heart-attack) Huuh?  
  
Rauru: Link, I am pleased to see that you are alive and well. After your travels, you must be tired and homesick. I would like to see you go home but I sense a powerful presence towards Gerudo Valley. You must find out what it is.  
  
Link: Do I have to??  
  
Rauru: YES!!!!!!! You are the Chosen One!!! You are the Hero of Time!!! You must!  
  
Link: OK! FINE!!! I'LL GO!!!!!! But just one question... Rauru: Yes?  
  
Link: Can I go home for two days?  
  
Rauru: NO!  
  
Link: .......  
  
Rauru: GO NOW!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Well, as Link sets off towards Gerudo Valley, he wonders if he'll ever get home. He's sure that he will, but when? He feels...... so ......tired......  
  
Navi: LINK!!! DON'T FALL ASLEEP!!!!!!!!  
  
Link: Ohhh.........  
  
What peril awaits Link at Gerudo Valley? Is it Kapeora??? Will Link ever get home?? Will Navi ever get off his back??? Navi: Shut up!! I am the author, you know! Navi: NO.................I'M CHANGING!!!!!(Is chibified [if that's even possible for Navi]) MUAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!! NOBODY EVER TELLS ME TO SHUT UP!!! (Coughs) Well, will Link ever get home?? What does Saria think of his adventures??? Or Malon? Or Zelda? Wait, Zelda knows of his adventures, so she wouldn't count...... Oh well. Find out anyways in the next discovery of...The Lost Chronicles! 


	3. What? I'm not sleeping

The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicles  
  
Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING BUT BOB!!!!!! (A/N: I need tips on how to get my story more publicity! NOBODY READS IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!! Bob: Ok, how about this... PLEASE READ THIS!!! ;;  
  
Chapter 3: WHAT? I'm not sleeping... (A/N: It's still nighttime...)  
  
We join our hero as he is trekking towards the source of the evil and our hero is STILL exhausted......because it's like 2 a.m....  
  
Navi: LINK!!! HEY!!!!! WAKE UP!!!!!  
  
Link: TT aww.... Come on, Navi! Just five more minutes...  
  
Navi: NO! YOU MUST STOP THE EVIL IN GERUDO VALLEY BEFORE YOU SLEEP!!!!! THE FATE OF HYRULE IS IN YOUR HANDS!!!!!!  
  
Link: You're so mean... and bitchy  
  
Navi: SHUT UP AND KEEP MOVING!!!  
  
As our hero continues, he realizes that he's already at Gerudo Valley!  
  
Link: Hey look! We're here already!!! Now can I sleep???  
  
Navi: NO!  
  
Link: Please??? ;;  
  
Navi: NO! REMEMBER YOUR DUTIES!!!  
  
Link: Aww...  
  
As Link enters Gerudo Valley, he is stop by a Gerudo Guard... (A/N 3: Yeah, how's he gonna get past this? In the game, you can't get into Gerudo Valley as a kid, so....) GG: Halt! Who goes there???  
  
Link: I'm just an innocent boy from the south...  
  
GG: You're from the south??? You look so small...  
  
Link: Do you even know the race that lives down there??? I'M A KOKORI!!!  
  
GG: Oh, are those some kind of midgets or something??? Oh well, just go through... wait a minute... Why are you here?  
  
Link: I'm just here to defeat evil.  
  
GG: OK!  
  
As Link passes the guard, he wonders why this was so easy. (A/N: I do too... Bob: YOU'RE THE AUTHOR!!! OO) Ok.... anyways, as he enters, he reminisces about his experiences here.  
  
Navi: Link! You need to search every room for the source of evil!! I'll beep when you're close!!!   
  
Link: Ok... OO  
  
Well, anyways, as Link was scavenging through the fortress' rooms, with Navi constantly beeping, he soon found a bed and fell asleep while Navi was in another room. But then...  
  
Navi: LINK!! YOU LITTLE...YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO FALL ASLEEP!

Link: What! I'm not asleep... I'm just looking under the sheets...  
  
Navi: Ok, whatever you say... JUST KEEP LOOKING!!;  
  
Well, while Link was "looking under the sheets", the Evil was being summoned in the THRONE ROOM!!! (BUM BUM BUM!!!)  
  
We cut to a scene where there are a lot of Gerudo tribe-women surrounding a large gateway that is engulfed in flame. (Cultic Twilight Zone, anyone?)  
  
THRONE ROOM Gerudo #1: Ok! We shall now perform the ritual!  
  
Gerudo #2: Aww...But do we have to?  
  
G1: YES!!  
  
G2: Man...  
  
G1: OK! BEGIN!!!(Turns on boom box while Richard Simmons pops in)  
  
Richard: OK! GO!!!! Come on, ladies, keep those legs high in the air!! One and two and three and four and......  
  
While the Gerudo are having their...summoning session... We return to Link who has taken a nice nap...  
  
Link: (Yawn) Oh, man! That was a good rest!  
  
Navi: I THOUGHT YOU WERE SEARCHING UNDER THE SHEETS!!!! ;  
  
Link: Shoot! I thought you went somewhere else!  
  
Navi: GO SEARCH THE THRONE ROOM!!!!  
  
Link: Fine! ...Ugh, Navi really needs to go decaf....  
  
Will Link ever find out what the Gerudos are doing?? Will he be able to stop the "summoning"? WILL NAVI EVER GET DECAF?!?!?!?!? Find out in the next part of the epic saga called The Lost Chronicles!!!


	4. The Summoning

The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicals

Chapter 3…er…..4!!!: The Summoning

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!!!!!! (other than Bob…)

A/N: Just when you thought I tumbled over a cliff, ………well, actually I did…. Stupid Bob pushed me…..but anyways…. Ok…..I BACK!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHA…(goes on for 5 minutes)!!! Now on with the story!!!!!

In our last episode, a very tired Link and a very angry and hyperactive Navi were in search of Great Evil inside of the Gerudo Fortress. Or at least Navi was…….

Link: Can I go to sleep??

Navi: NO!!

Link: Please??? There's a bed over there… nice…comfy…

Navi: WHEN I SAY NO, I MEAN NOO!!!! 

Link: Aww… just a little bit…..

Navi: (Really REALLY mad) NOOO!!!!!!

Well, we see that Navi hasn't gotten any decaf yet, so let's stay away from her for now and go to the…….

Evil Throne Room of DOOM!!!! 

Here we see the lovely Gerudo guards having a lovely picnic on the floor…………..Hey! Wait a minute!! Aren't you girls supposed to be summoning the Great Evil???

GG #1: Sorry, it just took so long for you to continue, and Richard Simmons was getting so tired… Look! His whole body is sore!

RS rolls in with a body cast on in a wheelchair

RS: (Using a voice box) Look! I can't move!!! I can't shimmy anymore!!!!

Sorry, but I am The Author!!!!(Lighting flash) Nothing can stop the story so get up!!!!

RS: But I…

I SAID GET UP!!!!!!!!! (Light goes on Richard Simmons)

RS: I am cured!!!!

(Lightning bolt)

RS: Ok………..maybe………not………..

Bob: GET ON WITH THE STORY!!!!

Huh? Oh yeah, right… Anyways, the Gerudo Guards are doing their Summoning Spell of Doom over a sort of tomb. Green mist envelopes around the tomb and the guards start chanting a mystical song….too mystical to be uttered in this story, but it does involve " I'm a genie in a bottle" so………… The room starts to shake and the guards run in dismay! Then suddenly, the shaking stops…. The green mist is cleared………

A hand breaks forth from in front of the tomb………..

Whose hand is it? What will happen to Link and Navi??? WHAT ARE THE WORDS TO THAT SONG???? IS RICHARD OK???? WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME???

(Slap)

Oh, ok….. Find out in the next episode of……….. THE LOST CHRONICALS!!!


	5. Blah blah blah, Yak yak yak

The Legend of Zelda: The Lost Chronicles

**Chapter 5: Blah blah blah, Yak yak yak…** (Geez, titles are hard…)

As we return with our hero, we see that he is wide awake after constant yelling about not falling asleep…

Navi: THAT'S RIGHT!!!!! YOU'RE NOT FALLING ASLEEP ON MY WATCH!!!!!

Link: I feel like I'm in prison…(groan)

As our heroes continue to search for the Sacrificial Chamber (STILL), they hear a moaning sound!!!

Link: Hey! What's that?? Navi, go up and look at it while the Player presses Z!

Hey!!! You're not supposed to know that you're being controlled by a Player!!! (Jedi Hand wave)You do not know you are in a video game. These are not the droids you are looking for. (Zap)

Link: These are not the droids I'm looking for…

Navi: What are droids?

Never mind that. ON WITH THE STORY!!!!!!

Navi checked upon the ominous (OOOOH!! BIG WORD!) sound coming around the corner.

Navi: ?

???: ROOAAAAAR!!!!!!!

Navi: AGHH!!!! LINK!!! HELP!!!!! LISTEN!!!!!!!!!!

In front of Navi shot up a decrepit, decaying, dead hand grabbing her in a deadly clutch of deadliness!!!!!! (Ooooh!!! Alliteration!!! )

RPG FIGHT!!!!!!

Link: WHAT??????????

Fine…..RPG DEATH FIGHT!!!!!!

Link: Much better… --;;

LINK: 1000/1000

NAVI: 350/350

???: 2000/2000

START!!!!!!!!

Link's turn

Link: OK!!! Sword slash!!

100 HP damage

??? HP 1900/2000

Link: WHAT!!! I'm stronger than that!!!

Fine!!! Geez, I could've made it only 1 hp, but nooooo!

??? HP 1500/2000

Link: Much better!

Navi's turn

Navi: CAFFIENE BLAST!!!!

1000 damage!!!

??? HP 500/2000

Navi: OH YEAH!!!!!! (Hyper on caffeine)

Link: Why can't my attacks be that strong…..;;

Navi: BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO YOUNG TO DRINK COFFEE!!!!

Link/???: OO;;

???'s turn: Apocalypse Attack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5000 damage!!!!! TO BOTH NAVI AND LINK!!!!!!!

Navi: XX

Link: XX

MATCH OVER

???: They'll never know who I am!!! I AM GANONDORF!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Link/Navi: Dude, we're standing right here.

Ganondorf: Huh??? Hey! Weren't you guys just dead??

Link: Yeah but in case you forgot, we're in a game where I can die as many times as you are ugly…

Navi: And that's a lot!!

Link: And I will be reborn with the help of the goddesses!! SO HAH!!

Ganondorf: Oh well… Bye!!!

Ganondorf leaves on a broomstick powered by his grannies, Kotake and Koume (They are his grannies, right??)

Kotake: Oh Ganny!! You're hurt!!

Koume: Come hear and let me kiss your boo-boo, Ganny

Link/Navi:OO;;

Ganondorf: --;;

Well, just for the sake of Ganondorf's dignity and my sheer will of it, THIS IS THE END OF CHAPTER 5!! But what will be Ganondorf's plans this time?? Will Link be able to stop him?? CAN GANONDORF ESCAPE FROM HIS OVER PROTECTIVE GRANNIES??? FIND OUT IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF THE LOS CHRONICALS!!!! WHY AM I YELLING!?!?!?!?!?!?

(Please review!! I need love too!)


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